Leadership Red Flags Nobody Talks About (But Your Team Definitely Notices)

We Don’t Mean To Be “That Boss”… But Sometimes We Are

Let’s be honest, most of us don’t set out to be that boss. You know, the one people vent about on the group chat.

But have you heard of quiet quitting? Yep, it’s a real thing. It’s when people don’t technically leave their jobs, they just mentally check out. They stop going the extra mile, stop speaking up, stop caring like they used to. And often, it’s not because they’re lazy… it’s because they’ve given up trying.

Sometimes, without even realising it, we slide into habits that cause that. Habits that quietly unravel trust, motivation, and morale.

And here’s the kicker: no one tells you. They just… go quiet. Stop contributing. Switch off. And suddenly, you’re wondering why your team doesn’t seem to care as much as you do.

It’s a tough pill to swallow, but if you’re brave enough to look, you’ll probably find a few leadership red flags waving gently behind you. I’ve been there. And I want to share what I’ve learned (often the hard way) about spotting those flags before they become full-blown bonfires.

🚩 Being the Martyr Isn’t Leadership – It’s Exhaustion

When I first stepped into leadership, I thought it was all about being the hardest worker in the room. Head down. Nose to the grindstone. Show people how it’s done.

But here’s the problem: that version of leadership is exhausting — for everyone.

If you’re constantly “on,” doing everything, never showing vulnerability or asking for help, guess what? Your team thinks that’s the expectation. They feel like they can’t keep up. Or worse, they stop trying. Because what’s the point if the boss is just going to do it all anyway?

That’s one of the biggest leadership red flags: accidental martyrdom. You’re not leading, you’re hoarding. And it breeds resentment, not respect.

🚩 You Say You Want Feedback… But Can You Take It?

Here’s another one I’ve been guilty of: saying I want feedback, but flinching when I actually get it.

Someone offers an idea or critique and suddenly you’re defending yourself like you’re in a courtroom drama. Your team clock that immediately. It tells them: “Yeah, they said they’re open to feedback, but… not really.”

And then what happens? People stop speaking up. Innovation dies. That silence isn’t peace. It’s disengagement.

🚩 The Mindset That Changes Everything

Now, I get it. Leadership can feel lonely. You want to get it right. You care deeply. And that voice in your head (you know the one), is already whispering, “You’re not good enough. You should have this figured out by now.”

But here’s the truth. No one has it all figured out. Not even the ones writing the books and running the courses (and yes, I say that as someone who wrote the book and runs the courses).

One of the most powerful things I’ve learned, and it’s baked into everything we teach at The Power Within Training, is that mindset is everything. Motivational Intelligence (MQ) is our framework, and it’s changed not just how I lead, but how I live.

It’s the difference between reacting and responding. Between being the leader people work around… and the one they work for.

🚩 Avoiding Difficult Conversations? Yep, That’s a Red Flag Too

Take avoiding tough conversations. That one used to have a permanent seat at my table. I’d convince myself it “wasn’t the right time” or “they’ll figure it out.”

Spoiler: they didn’t.

All I did was let resentment and confusion grow, until it boiled over.

Now, I lean into those chats. Not because I love confrontation (I don’t). But because clarity is kindness. And avoiding it is one of the most damaging leadership red flags there is.

🚩 You Don’t Need All the Answers – Just Better Questions

There’s another one no one talks about: being the hero. Always having the answers. Jumping in with solutions before anyone else can speak.

You might think it’s helpful, but actually, you’re robbing your team of ownership, confidence, and growth.

I’ve learned (slowly, painfully, with plenty of raised eyebrows from my team) that the best leaders don’t have all the answers, they have the best questions.

“Where do you think we should start?”
“What’s the outcome you’re aiming for?”
“How can I support you without stepping in?”

Little shifts. Massive impact.

This Isn’t About Being a Perfect Leader, It’s About Being a Human One

If any of this has you squirming, good! It means you care. It means you’re ready to lead better. And it doesn’t mean you’re a bad leader. It just means you’re a human one.

And that’s the leader your team needs.

You’re Not Alone, And You Don’t Have to Figure This Out Alone Either

At The Power Within Training, this is the stuff we live and breathe. We’re not about fancy jargon or endless theory. We help you lead with mindset, so you can create a culture where people grow, contribute, and actually want to stay.

Because when you lead with self-awareness, courage, and curiosity, everything changes.

So here’s a little homework (don’t worry, no spreadsheets involved):

Next time your team goes quiet, or someone makes a mistake, or a project stalls, ask yourself:
🚩 “Is there a red flag I’ve been ignoring?” 🚩

And if you need help figuring that out? We’re just a message away.

We’ve helped thousands of leaders across the UK do this work — and I promise, it’s the most rewarding part of the job.

Mindset first. Always.

James Fleming
The Power Within Training
The Motivational Intelligence Company
james@tpwtd.com

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